Yesterday morning, I saw this sitting on the edge of the melting snow (not much melting though but we will take a little melting even if it’s a fluke). It is my gnome in a boot planter that I had on the porch steps last summer that did not get brought in before the snow flew. It has been stuck, unbeknownst to me, under a snow pile. Unfortunately, sometimes I don’t take very good care of my toys.
But? When I came outside yesterday at dawn to start the car? It did not yet look like that. It looked like this:
Which, to my morning brain, looked like a BOOT IN THE SNOW! Which technically it is. But I did not grasp that the owner of the boot was a gmome at 6 something in the morning. I thought it was some poor person who had fallen in the snow and has been there for the duration!!
A PERSON IN THE SNOW! I had about a minute and a half of panic. What would I do? Call 911? Who is it? I hope it’s not anyone I know! GOD! There is a PERSON FROZEN IN MY YARD!
My heart was thumping hard as I stood in the cold waiting for the truth to dawn on me. And it did, dawn on me of course.
Oh, right, my gnome planter. Phew!
And then I thought, what would have happened if I HAD called 911? Imagine? All the rescue squads showing up, me, the traumatized bystander wrapped in a foil blanket holding a trauma teddy bear, my husband sleeping through the whole thing upstairs no doubt. The rescuers? Digging in that snow, expecting the worst, would find a GNOME PLANTER.
Should we pronounce Mr. Gnome dead? Or bring him to the hospital?
Poor guy, never had a chance.
This makes me VERY happy that we can have a happy, non violent, pee free future.
Yes, we Can.